मुलगी: तू माझ्यासाठी काय करशील?
मुलगा: काय करू?
मुलगी: मला चन्द्र आणून देशील?
मुलगा: मग पृथ्वीभोवती काय तुझा बाप फिरणार? :-)
Have a nice weekend and Take Care, folks!
Friday, September 24, 2010
Here's what I heard on one of the FM channels yesterday:
Japanese proverb:
If someone can do a task, you should be able to do it as well.
If no one has managed to do a task, you should try to be the first one to do it.
Indian version:
If someone can do a task, let him/her do it.
If no one has managed to do a task, it's probably not worth doing it.
Do you think that's what has happened during CWG arrangements?
Japanese proverb:
If someone can do a task, you should be able to do it as well.
If no one has managed to do a task, you should try to be the first one to do it.
Indian version:
If someone can do a task, let him/her do it.
If no one has managed to do a task, it's probably not worth doing it.
Do you think that's what has happened during CWG arrangements?
Trust the customer service people to call you during your busiest moments. I got such a call from my mobile company yesterday morning. Not wanting to commit to anything which would later add digits on my monthly bill I asked the person to call me in the evening.
I had just stepped out of the office when he dutifully called. Once I confirmed my number, he asked me my name. In my dictionary, this is as severe a crime as committed by those who call you and then demand to know who is speaking without first identifying themselves. So I told him that if he knew my number and was from the company he claimed to be from, he would have my name in the database. Thereupon he gave my name and asked me to confirm it - which I happily did.
He then proceeded to inform me that the net browsing facility had been turned on my phone. I got immediately alarmed and asked him if I was being billed for this. He said no. He said that I will also not be billed if I browsed any free sites - though download charges would apply. I would be, of course, billed for any non-free sites. By this time, I was beginning to show symptoms of attention-deficit-syndrome. So I reconfirmed what is going to cost me and what is free - once again. This must have given him an impression that he is speaking with someone with a pea-sized brain. I am pretty sure he went through the list just to be sure I got it all right. I admired his patience but was getting sort of bored with the whole conversation. However, my "he-is-just-doing-his-job" feeling was too strong to let me disconnect. Where in India do you find such hardworking people?
I was rescued however by his next question. As he needed to instruct me on how to set things up on my cell phone, he asked me if there was any other phone in sight. Jumping at the chance, I informed him that I was on my way home and would call their department later. Now, in my heart of hearts, I knew that I would never make that call because I hate the very concept of accessing my mails on cellphone. In fact, years ago, during one of my 'misanthropic' bouts I had remarked to one of my colleagues that the mobile phones should not have any incoming call facility. He had almost fell off the chair laughing!
So, the sum total of this long winding post is that I spent a good 10 minutes of my evening time politely listening to a customer service rep about a service that I am unlikely to use. Now that my weekly quota of patience and politeness is almost over, let this post be a warning to any such people thinking of calling me. Thank your stars that I cannot bite your head off remotely :-)
I had just stepped out of the office when he dutifully called. Once I confirmed my number, he asked me my name. In my dictionary, this is as severe a crime as committed by those who call you and then demand to know who is speaking without first identifying themselves. So I told him that if he knew my number and was from the company he claimed to be from, he would have my name in the database. Thereupon he gave my name and asked me to confirm it - which I happily did.
He then proceeded to inform me that the net browsing facility had been turned on my phone. I got immediately alarmed and asked him if I was being billed for this. He said no. He said that I will also not be billed if I browsed any free sites - though download charges would apply. I would be, of course, billed for any non-free sites. By this time, I was beginning to show symptoms of attention-deficit-syndrome. So I reconfirmed what is going to cost me and what is free - once again. This must have given him an impression that he is speaking with someone with a pea-sized brain. I am pretty sure he went through the list just to be sure I got it all right. I admired his patience but was getting sort of bored with the whole conversation. However, my "he-is-just-doing-his-job" feeling was too strong to let me disconnect. Where in India do you find such hardworking people?
I was rescued however by his next question. As he needed to instruct me on how to set things up on my cell phone, he asked me if there was any other phone in sight. Jumping at the chance, I informed him that I was on my way home and would call their department later. Now, in my heart of hearts, I knew that I would never make that call because I hate the very concept of accessing my mails on cellphone. In fact, years ago, during one of my 'misanthropic' bouts I had remarked to one of my colleagues that the mobile phones should not have any incoming call facility. He had almost fell off the chair laughing!
So, the sum total of this long winding post is that I spent a good 10 minutes of my evening time politely listening to a customer service rep about a service that I am unlikely to use. Now that my weekly quota of patience and politeness is almost over, let this post be a warning to any such people thinking of calling me. Thank your stars that I cannot bite your head off remotely :-)
I was watching an episode of "Bones" for the first time on Star World yesterday. In this episode, FBI Special Agent (does the FBI have any agents who are not special?) Booth's brother falls in love with an Indian girl. When Booth meets her, he remarks that he is surprised at the fluency of her spoken English. I couldn't help but smile at that. Perhaps, the agent has not heard what the Brits have to say about American English! Anyways, the lady in question turns out to be a 3rd generation American and hence the fluent English!
Thursday, September 23, 2010
A got an SMS in the morning which said the following:
Fantastic lesson taught in IIM:
Start working to fulfill your dreams.
Otherwise some day someone will put you to work to fulfill his dreams.
I am not sure about IIM but life surely teaches you this lesson - again and again, if you don't get it right the first time!
Fantastic lesson taught in IIM:
Start working to fulfill your dreams.
Otherwise some day someone will put you to work to fulfill his dreams.
I am not sure about IIM but life surely teaches you this lesson - again and again, if you don't get it right the first time!
I got the following SMS from a friend today morning:
२४ सितम्बर को राम जन्मभूमि-बाबरी मस्जिद का फैसला होनेवाला है। हो सकता है इस फैसले से कोई विवाद हो
अलग अलग धार्मिक पार्टीज आपको उकसाए, मंदिर या मस्जिदकी बात करे। तो एक बात याद रखना के दंगोमे मरनेवाला न हिन्दू होता है न मुसलमान। वो सिर्फ किसीका भाई, बेटा, बाप या किसीके घरका चिराग होता है। क्योंकि वो सिर्फ और सिर्फ इन्सान होता है, कोई हिन्दू या मुसलमान नहीं होता। और इसी इंसानियत के नाते इस मेसेजको जितना हो सके फैला दो।
I fully agree. Personally, I feel there should be a hospital on that site so as to avoid antagonizing either community. But whatever happens, I hope and pray that this country doesn't witness any communal riots again!
२४ सितम्बर को राम जन्मभूमि-बाबरी मस्जिद का फैसला होनेवाला है। हो सकता है इस फैसले से कोई विवाद हो
अलग अलग धार्मिक पार्टीज आपको उकसाए, मंदिर या मस्जिदकी बात करे। तो एक बात याद रखना के दंगोमे मरनेवाला न हिन्दू होता है न मुसलमान। वो सिर्फ किसीका भाई, बेटा, बाप या किसीके घरका चिराग होता है। क्योंकि वो सिर्फ और सिर्फ इन्सान होता है, कोई हिन्दू या मुसलमान नहीं होता। और इसी इंसानियत के नाते इस मेसेजको जितना हो सके फैला दो।
I fully agree. Personally, I feel there should be a hospital on that site so as to avoid antagonizing either community. But whatever happens, I hope and pray that this country doesn't witness any communal riots again!
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
All hell is breaking loose at the CWG venue - literally and figuratively! A day after the overbridge collapsed, a ceiling has caved in. Now there are suggestions to postpone the games till 2011.
What is the use of postponing if the same bunch of lousy jokers are going to be responsible for organizing the games? Postponing will make sense only if the meddling ministers, bureaucrats and other good-for-nothing minions are kicked out of the place. There will be many retired armed forces personnel who, if given charge of this situation, would make sure that the arrangements are impeccable. Let them create a medium to keep the common man informed about the progress. Let the Media take responsibility for pulling up people for any lousiness. Let the country make this a prestige issue and strive to only better things up from this point on. Otherwise it is a hopelessly lost cause - one which will damage India's reputation for years to come!
What is the use of postponing if the same bunch of lousy jokers are going to be responsible for organizing the games? Postponing will make sense only if the meddling ministers, bureaucrats and other good-for-nothing minions are kicked out of the place. There will be many retired armed forces personnel who, if given charge of this situation, would make sure that the arrangements are impeccable. Let them create a medium to keep the common man informed about the progress. Let the Media take responsibility for pulling up people for any lousiness. Let the country make this a prestige issue and strive to only better things up from this point on. Otherwise it is a hopelessly lost cause - one which will damage India's reputation for years to come!
Today morning I read an article in a Marathi daily about the mistakes that we Indians do while writing and speaking English. Among other mistakes, the author had pointed out how we tend to use "concerned people" when we actually mean "people concerned". But there was one mistake that she had left out - the confusion between 'lose' and 'loose'. Another such pair is 'quite' and 'quiet'.
The article mentioned how Lord Macaulay's books were banned in India by the British so as to keep the Indians from learning the correct use of their language. When I read this, I wondered if I could read these books now to improve my knowledge of the language. I don't particularly relish the thought of negotiating again through the maze of gerunds, infinitives, prepositions and tenses - which are a hazy memory from school days. Some might also say that there is no need to speak the language as the British do. After all, aren't the Americans getting by just fine without speaking British English? :-)
I remember an incident that happened just last week. I was speaking with a customer representative in a bank branch. While we were waiting for the photocopies ('xerox' in Indian parlance!) of some documents which I had just signed, she asked me what I do for a living. I told her that I am a software consultant. She remarked that computers were like white elephants to her. For a moment, I was stumped. 'White elephant', according to me, means something which is too expensive to maintain and not particularly useful. I am sure that in this day and age, computers don't fit that description. What she probably meant was that computers are like Greek and Latin to her!
Years ago, while working in the US, I once used the word "crib" as verb while speaking with my American boss. He got confused. Tongue-in-cheek, he remarked that crib is a noun and used to denote a thing where babies are kept. I enlightened him and said that in India 'crib' can also be a verb and mean 'to complain'.
I wonder what Lord Macaulay would have said to this! :-)
The article mentioned how Lord Macaulay's books were banned in India by the British so as to keep the Indians from learning the correct use of their language. When I read this, I wondered if I could read these books now to improve my knowledge of the language. I don't particularly relish the thought of negotiating again through the maze of gerunds, infinitives, prepositions and tenses - which are a hazy memory from school days. Some might also say that there is no need to speak the language as the British do. After all, aren't the Americans getting by just fine without speaking British English? :-)
I remember an incident that happened just last week. I was speaking with a customer representative in a bank branch. While we were waiting for the photocopies ('xerox' in Indian parlance!) of some documents which I had just signed, she asked me what I do for a living. I told her that I am a software consultant. She remarked that computers were like white elephants to her. For a moment, I was stumped. 'White elephant', according to me, means something which is too expensive to maintain and not particularly useful. I am sure that in this day and age, computers don't fit that description. What she probably meant was that computers are like Greek and Latin to her!
Years ago, while working in the US, I once used the word "crib" as verb while speaking with my American boss. He got confused. Tongue-in-cheek, he remarked that crib is a noun and used to denote a thing where babies are kept. I enlightened him and said that in India 'crib' can also be a verb and mean 'to complain'.
I wonder what Lord Macaulay would have said to this! :-)
Don't you think those responsible for the Commonwealth Games disaster should be publicly flogged? Sounds rather severe? Nope. I think this punishment is mild compared to the crime. These idiots have tarnished India's image on the international scene and if recent news is anything to go by, severely damaged the chances of other developing countries to host the games in future.
I sincerely hope these other countries are not punished for our crimes. After all, not many countries in the world will be having officials who don't give a damn about what the rest of the world thinks about their country. It's only us Indians who are like that.
I guess it's time to say "Chuck De, India". :-(
I sincerely hope these other countries are not punished for our crimes. After all, not many countries in the world will be having officials who don't give a damn about what the rest of the world thinks about their country. It's only us Indians who are like that.
I guess it's time to say "Chuck De, India". :-(
Monday, September 20, 2010
I couldn't help but burst out laughing when I read Father Pat Connor's list of men whom women should not marry. The question that will be uppermost in the mind of any Indian woman who reads this will be "Who on earth are we supposed to marry then?" ;-)
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